Wednesday, October 24, 2007

San Diego Show Down

So, you’ve probably heard. DC is one of ugliest cities in the country. Not architecturally, or even politically. I’m talking about us, the people. You and me. Ugly. We’ve been voted one of the least attractive cities in the country by the readers of Travel and Leisure Magazine. Over 60,000 people participated in the survey. Its official. Only lowly Philadelphia is rated worse. Who tops the list? No surprise, Miami, followed by the consistently forgotten and underrated city of San Diego. Oddly Charleston, SC took 3rd. I've been to Charleston. That's suspect. I can't say more.

Wait, I’m not ready for this. I will not concede. I’m not demanding a recount, but I am demanding a reevaluation. Let’s stack up the candidates; let’s compare apples to oranges. I’m not so sure we are one of America’s ugliest cities. Since we’re second worse, I’m targeting the so-called-second-best, San Diego. Who's more attractive, FOR REAL. Forget polls and surveys, let's look at the facts, er..., I mean faces.

Round One:
DC's Mayor Adrian Fenty VS San Diego's Mayor Jerry Sanders

With all due respect, there's no contest here. And Fenty is a marathon runner. Plus he personally returns email. DC 1, SD none.

Round Two:

DC's NBC Sports Reporter Lindsay Czarniak VS San Diego's NBC Sports Reporter Derek Togerson

Call in a sick day Togerson. DC 2, SD zero.

Round Three:
DC's Hometown Celebrity Dave Chappelle VS San Diego's Hometown Celebrity Ted Danson

Paging Doctor Becker. Becker? Doctor Becker. More like Dr. Washed Up. If the time period was 1986ish, this may have been a fair fight, but its 2007. DC 3, SD nada.

Round Four:
DC's Ward 4 Member Muriel Bowser VS San Diego's District 4 Member Tony Young

Oh Muriel. She's done such a good job replacing the mayor in Ward 4 and responding to neighborhood wants and needs. Mr. Young; not sure about his record. But, as far as being easy on the eyes, I have to go with Ms. Bowser on this one. DC 4, SD zero.

Well, I could go on here, but just imagine. We'd have to invoke the 10 run rule. The game would get ugly, we'd brushback one of their guys, they'd charge the mound. Umps would break up the fight. The game would resume, with DC still up 22-0. That would be ugly.

Who’s walking who now San Diego!? So sad. Obviously Travel and Leisure Magazine was a little off. Either that or the readers haven't REALLY people watched in either of these cities. And hold your head up Philly. You may well be the fattest, but I'm pretty sure you're not the ugliest. And neither are we.